Noah's first day of school......I pray it goes very well...

I am a mixed bag of emotions. I want him to go and experience this and try this again and I want him to be successful. At the same time I will surely miss him because since he has been born except for when he tried public school before and was gone a few hours during the day......Noah has pretty much been around me all the time. He has been my buddy to run around with as well besides working on things here at home. There was incredible comfort in knowing my son was in the next room safe and sound all the time.

Now my mind will be wondering all the time if he is okay or safe or doing well and having fun.

I had no idea how this experience for ME would trigger so many bad memories up from the past when Noah tried a public school before.

I know I need to let it go.....trust in God to take care of him whenever I cannot.....and go with the flow.

So.......today I will be poised and ready.....paddles in hand.

shit.....