Sunday, January 15, 2017

Dear are now 18 years old...........when did that happen?

Wow..cannot believe it has been like over a month since I posted any updates. I know things are going pretty well when I don't post that much OR things are going too rough and personal and I don't share. Let's just say a lot has been happening in the past couple of months. You have finished your first semester of college courses and got an A in the Customer Service/marketing class and a B in the Business Management did VERY well and I am very proud of you and I believe this has boosted your confidence level which you definitely needed! You will start your next 2 classes next week.......English composition (to prepare you for Business Communications) and a marketing class..forget now off the top of my head what it is called. I think you will do well......but time will tell. 

You have dealt with some personal issues which I will not go into they are personal.....and you have not always made the best choices or handled them the best but you are learning. I do try to always understand you and help you through trying times but it seems I was not even aware of some of your trying times because you did not let me know. When I found out you held a knife to your throat and wanted to die during this personal time I was so devastated.......but so thankful it was mostly just a threat to someone and not something you really would want to do. However, your more immature responses to times of personal crises reminds me of the fact that while young....and young people can be super dramatic at are still more emotionally behind than your peers at the same age as you. I do not have a problem with that as I know from the past you will catch up......but I know it makes it harder for you to be ready to take those first steps out into the real world. I am trying all I can to prepare you....but it takes time and you move at a slower pace in this regard than others your age. NOT all...just some. In a way that is kind of normal probably for kids your age. 

We did have a small birthday celebration at your grandma and grandpa's house after Christmas since everyone was there..or just about we always do to make it convenient for everyone not to have to get together again over the holiday rush.....but you have always wanted to have a party at CiCi's Pizza ....and with the holidays and some not feeling well and work schedule conflicts I figured once again we would not be able to do this....but your aunt Angela arranged a SURPRISE birthday party for you at ...yes...CiCi's Pizza!

When I got you over there you had no idea and when you walked in and saw everyone and realized your wish of over 2 years was finally coming teared up.....but you were so happy. I DID cry the semi-ugly cry lol..but tried to keep it together. We had a great time there and good food and playing arcade games. Big shout out thank you again to my sister Angela and everyone else who came along to celebrate Noah's 18th birthday! 

I still can't believe you are now 18 years old. While there are a lot of "firsts" in your life and my life with you recently...there are also some "lasts" and things coming to an homeschooling. I have loved every minute of that and really never wanted to relinquish my duties in that regard even as you had to become more independent with your studies. I had a very hard time with that and still have kept most of my old school stuff I used to teach you with. I did donate a large box of items to Goodwill....which about tore me up.....but I did it. I have to remember sometimes it is okay to let go of the material thing as I still have the memories and photos. 

In another month or so you will get your permanent driver's license. Another big first was the fact that we had to register you for the selective service/draft. Life goes on and there will always be changes coming our way........and I am so thankful you were born and have shared your life and time with me. 

I love you to the moon and back again my little man.....though you are all grown up now! Love you! Mom XOXOXOX