Sunday, June 18, 2006

Dear Noah:

You are puzzling at times to me lately. You have done much better at expressing both yourself and your needs. You still have your moments but they are much more short lived and I am extremely thankful for that.

You sometimes try to describe how you feel and what you think. Many times when I ask you why you said something you will say "because it was just in my mind" or "cause it was in my stomach". I am thinking that perhaps when you say this it is because you are trying to find a way to describe what is actually going on inside of you. How you process things...and think. It is all extremely interesting and sometimes funny or cute and sometimes filled with love and sometimes a bit scary.
Like you told me the other day you typed in "killing men" into Googles search engine. When I asked you "WHY" you said your first response you did not know. I kept my prodding which really bothered you. Pretty soon you were covering your ears and rubbing them back and forth (a NEW behavior) and saying I was asking too many questions. I admit I was...but it bothered me tremendously that you would even come up with anything pertaining to killing to type into a search engine just to see what was there.

Then you said your "it was in my mind" and "It was in my stomach".....

you seem very curious about a lot of things. Some you truly do not seem to grasp or understand but when asked then you do. SO I am confused. I am trying to NOT get overly alarmed about much lately...and assume this is all part of your growing up.

Mommy loves you lots! :X

1 comment:

abianne said...

Maybe he meant "killing men" as an adj. and a noun instead of a verb and a noun.... you know, like he was looking up "the killing men" like army soldiers or something. Maybe he didn't mean it like "how to kill men." And that's not so alarming because he could've seen that or heard that in lots of normal places what with the war and all.